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Holly
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Holly

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PostSubject: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 4:32 am

Bullying, a pandemic among pre-teens all the way to young adulthood. Sometimes it can lead to disastrous effects, in a three stage system. Having been bullied myself and gone to stage two, even attempted the final stage a few times, I know it's the correct thing to do to get help from adults and close friends. However, once stages go from one to two it's hard to stop, and can have bad effects. Many things can happen in order to start this chain of events that could lead to the last and final stage.

The first stage is easy enough, your a freshman perhaps, or maybe an outcast at school and someone thinking they are better than you comes over and harasses you, or shoves you into a locker, or steals your stuff. You can get over that right? Well then it gets worse. Your texts, email, Facebook are all spammed with words to wreak you, and you start to crack. You want to tell your parents but your afraid of how they may react? I know, I've been there many times. The best way to stop this from going any farther is to get an adult, or to stand up for yourself. Once you stand up for yourself, many bullies turn tail and find a new prey. If you know someone who is being bullied, comfort the victim and tell someone about the bully. If you don't, the next two stages could weigh heavy on your conscious.

The second stage is relieving the stress, which I've done a few times, and I know many of you have. Cutting, Pyromania, Compulsive shopping? All of these are ways teens find to relieve stress. Sure, some turn to writing, or poetry such as I have, and some go to others things like music. However many of us choose to be destructive with our gifted bodies. Taking drugs, obsessive alcohol, those are also stress relievers I know some of my friends used. Cutting, which is the one I've done before converting to writing and poetry, hurts, but it brings the person....satisfaction in a way. It's not a good thing to do though, and recently I had to talk my friend out of it. Pyromania, which is lighting thing on fire for relief. Well, sounds fun right? But simply burning can turn to arson, and then arson can lead to jail, and even more stress. Sometimes, doing these destructive relievers can make the bullying increase, and the stress of it being too much leads to the last stage. Suicide.

Suicide is the performance of taking your own life, while homicide is the art of killing others. I've attempted suicide, I'm not going to lie. I've almost hung myself, and I've almost poisoned myself. Suicide might seem like the only way out at the time, but it's not. Explain your problem with an adult, a parent, a friend. Seeking help is the best way out, not killing yourself. Think of your family, your friends...the stress it would cause them. I know if I died many of you would feel responsible, or intense grief. One or two might take their own life as well. Bottom line?
Suicide is not the way out.

I found out that one of my ways of relief is to help others get help, so if you are being bullied, or abused; Perhaps, even maiming or hurting yourself, and want a friend to talk to, PM me. I'm on every day for the most part, except when I'm traveling for my brother.

I've also learned one important thing that I've recently once again taken to heart, and that is this: Be yourself, your original, your you, and no one is you-er than you. Being yourself is the best you can be.

Thank you for reading.
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Jules
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 4:52 am

Wow zach, I really like this. Thank you for writing.

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velisa
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 1:54 pm

isn't the second to the last sentence from dr. seus?
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Jules
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 2:08 pm

^Is that seriously all you got from this?

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Holly
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 3:06 pm

Yes it is Mr. Ventura. But please focus in the main topic of the article.
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daddeme
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 5:41 pm

This was brilliant. I couldn't have asked for a better article. Bullying is something that I believe should be taken very seriously, as it as increased in frequency over the years.
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hellaxya
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 7:26 pm

Thank you so much for sheding light on this subject, it makes me sad to realize that most of the second part applies to me. Again thank you for writing this :)
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communist
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 7:41 pm

This is beautiful <3 Thank you.
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Milocross
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 8:10 pm

This is probably the most on-point summary of bullying. I relieve my stress with pyromania. Well done, Zach.
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Holly
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/12/2013, 10:35 pm

Your welcome all of you. It's something I've had to stand up against for a while, having been bullied. I'm writing more articles in the near future like this one, hopefully covering enormous topics such as bullying. It saddens me though to see young men and women take there loves for things that can be prevented...
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Bell
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime7/15/2013, 2:51 am

Seriously, Zach, that's deep. People in my school should really read this. I was a new student almost three years ago and I was also bullied (mostly mentally but also physically, once)...and soon I will be going to endure the same cycle as my parent and I are actually having some talks about moving me to another country for studying.
Thank you.
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jake.
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 2:37 am

Wow...this is 'Gob-stopping' Zachy. <3
It's really beautiful, and I'm sure those who get bullied will take this to heart. Well, hopefully atleast. You've got some kick-@ss talent for writing, lets be honest. :)))

I hope you carry on with your writing. It's really great. :D
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nix
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 8:53 am

i've gone through bullying where a couple of girls disturbed me day & night since i shared a room with them for a week and it was so awful since it was because a girl who i trusted had turned my back on me and when i finally broke down in the bathroom, i told her that i despised her and i'm never forgiving her nor will i ever come back ( i was in a whole different country. of course, i told my parents, but they couldn't do anything since no family was close by to pick me up & they were in the us ). the thing that was absolutely ironic, when i told her these hateful words, she ended up crying and i told her, i quote, "f*ck off". of course, it was hard to say that when your slovak was clumsy, but after that, i ended up being so angry with my things being stolen & having to be demeaned throughout the whole time. i wish i could have told the counselors, but they liked the girls too much and i honestly had no energy to deal with the outcome when it was three more days of camp when i hit my lowest point. i didn't say anything to the girl's parents ( neither did my mother ), she ended up cracking on her own and calling them.

this article is purely fantastic and it reminded me of this experience, since when i came back from the camp of hell, i still had to sleep over the girl's house for a few weeks since my aunt couldn't take me in. everyone, other than my parents, told me that i'll be laughing at this experience in a few years. even the girl who bullied me, her parents ( her  family was nice, but by then, i was too pissed ). since i was able to take her one on one, i ended up ignoring her most of the time & even vaguely insulting her. i know it wasn't the best route, but that's how i coped with my bullying & i found enjoyment through putting her down for what she did to me. i'm still angry despite all these years. i still can't get over it, & whenever i'm supposed to write her letters, i just end up putting not-so-subtle hints that i loathe her and how i grew up from talking to her and how i learned some people are two-faced. lest to say, she never replied to my christmas letter.

eh, that's just how bitterness works, i suppose?

i wish i told an adult who could have made me switch rooms or something, but i didn't. this article made me recall this experience for some odd reason, & it's well-written.
thanks.

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beanie
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 9:11 am

zach, now this is awesome. <3
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Edgar Allan Poe
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 9:26 am

I was bullied as a child and a pre-teen. It was basically because I was different. Not in a bad way, but I wasn't what school society considers normal. I was shy, skinny, a reader, a good student, sucked with sports... I was always treated like a freak. I was rarely physically harassed, but some words hurt so much. For most people, it was just an evil joke. No one ever thought about how deep it wounded me. I had no true friends, no one beside me. For a few years, I was almost depressed. I had to go to a psychologist. A school adviced my parents so, because they always blame the victim. They said that I was problematic and the bullys were just normal children, so they wouldn't do anything about it. I had a very low self-esteem. I still do. You know, when someone repeats you the same offensive words many time, you'll end up believing it. It felt like the names were carved into my skin. I can still see the scars. I was so hurt that I became literally afraid of people. I slowly overcame this. Nowadays, I'm still overly socially inscure, but I can have a normal social life. Not everyone is as strong as I tried to be. It's been years, but it still makes me cry whenever I think about it. My childhood was suposed to be happy, but I still have a whole life to live. Bullying can make a 12-years-old think about suicide. So, here is an advice that I'd like to give to everyone: Always think about the impact of your words. What is funny to you can be painful to someone else. Never do to anyone something that you wouldn't like to be done to yourself. Everyone is different and we must accept it. And if you are the one being bullied, I can only ask you to stay strong. It's Demi Lovato's cliché, but it's true. No pain lasts forever. You can overcome all this, if you don't let yourself be brought down. I believe in you. You are not a freak, you are awesome just the way you were born. They are wrong, not you. "Those who were born to stand out are not suposed to hide."
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kayt smells
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 11:08 am

Zach, thank you. Thank you for shedding the light on bullying. Its a truly necessary topic to focus on. This isa fantastic article, Bravo to you.

This reminded me of how I have gone through all 3 stages. All my life.


From the time I went to Kindergarten, I was a social outcast. People would make fun of me for not talking (I was super shy) and they would say I couldn't talk and all I could do was read and write. Then when my teacher practically skipped me a grade by sending me to the first grade room to do math, science, writing, and reading. The first graders attacked. Also I was always the new girl. Always. We moved almost every year, and if not every year, in the middle of the school year. I've been physically bullied, and then mentally. I've been dragged across the concrete, I've been punched repeatedly, i've been kicked, pushed, and slapped. In 5th grade is was very bad, as long as my last school year (7th.) I was bullied to the point of the second stage.

I'm not going to lie about the things i did in 5th grade, I released my stress by pulling my hair, constantly hitting my head, and cutting. It's kinda weird to think a 5th grader would cut. It wasn't to major, and left barely visible scars. But the stress of all my life being bullied, and not to mention a good relationship with my parents. It just sucked. And one day in 5th grade i stood up for myself, and I am still proud. I remember that 'Mean girl clique' told me, "If you are to ever come back to this school. Why don't you loose some weight and get a tan. Also loose the glasses. Maybe you will be pretty then." and, I shouldn't have done it. But I took their lunch trays and dumped it on them.

Now 7th grade sucked. I had just moved to California, I had been in constant fights with my family, and to admit. I became a compulsive liar. It created more problems with me. Progressing over the months, it got better than it sucked again. My mom wanted me to make friends and such, so she made me go to this community place with teens and such and that was probably the worst thing my mother could do to me. After a while i got to the second stage again. And bad. I cut, I cut really deep and really badly, and I was anorexic and I burned things and I burned myself and I was giving up and it sucked. There was other problems going on and then one day, my sleeve slipped while I was at my orchestra. I was wearing a sweatshirt and at least 9 people came up to me and talked to me about my cuts. The concertmaster of our orchestra, asked if he could talk to me. We went aside, and we talked about it. And i realized, that my cutting effected other people. People ACTUALLY care if you cause harm to yourself, because you are causing harm to them. One girl, was visibly upset. And I haven't touched a knife since. I haven't starved myself since. Because I realized people do care, and I told myself I could do it.

If you tell yourself you can do it, you can. If you finally realize people DO care, stop. It was hard for me. I lowered it from over 50 cuts a day, in a 3 week period. To 0 cuts a day. I went from 0 calories a day. To 3000 calories a day. I went from 76 pounds to 107 pounds. Hell I am still bullied, but now I stand up for myself. I don't let it get to me. My life is blossoming right now. And i can say, I am happy.

Sucide is never worth it, I promise. I've tried overdose, I've tried hanging, I've tried drowning, and I have tried bleeding out. It is not worth it. Its not worth it.

It's not worth it.

I brought sadness to my friends, online and real life friends. I pushed away friendships because of this. It's never worth it. And if you do die. Your family and friends are going to be devastated. Just because you thought they didn't care. It's not worth it.

Now we all have bullied someone at least once in our life. I know I have. We all have. I feel really guilty, and I would be devastated if I was the cause of someone's death. We all have bullied, but it doesn't matter that we did bully, its that we feel bad and apologized (if we could) and try to never do it again. I have learned from my mistakes.

I am truly glad to say.

I am happy now.
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Milocross
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 12:07 pm

fro this was posted last year
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communist
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 12:33 pm

once a guy said mean things about me and i dreamt about vines coming out of his bedshests and strangling him
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Milocross
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 12:39 pm

dev you need help
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kayt smells
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 12:49 pm

This was posted last year, but people have been posting since yesterday. So. Lets not get off topic of the subject.
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Holly
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 1:15 pm

Well I'm glad that after being up a year that this topic is still having an affect on the members of this site. Thank you for reading itC and commenting to it. Bullying really is a big issue, and well, even a tiny rock can make ripples in a pond. I'm working on a third topic like this, hopefully it'll be finished soon for you guys.
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Milocross
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 2:57 pm

Well you're not allowed to bump topics so...
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kayt smells
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kayt smells

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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 3:20 pm

Cat i am fairly sure i didnt bump the topic???
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Toothless
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PostSubject: Re: Bullying   Bullying Icon_minitime8/13/2014, 3:37 pm

Since other people are sharing their stories let's do mine.

Ever since I started school, I was different. I was smart, I couldn't run a mile in under 12 minutes, I could't catch a ball or hit it with a bat, and I was always happy and refined. I thought of myself as the white queen. Others, not so much. Third grade is when it really got bad. People were picking on me all of the time because I was a military kid. My dad wasn't home for 6-7 months at a time, and it hurt me. A lot. People never understood really what I was going through because they had a forever home, forever friends, and they would never get what I felt. I started to stick myself with pins just to feel something. To me it was like taking a little rest after running half a mile, before getting up to run again. But my mile seemed to never end, and I had to take more and more breaks. I started cutting this year, in sixth grade. I never wanted to say I was depressed, because depression didn't belong in the white queens kingdom. Was I? I'm not sure. I was cutting everyday, and it had consumed my whole life. My ballet teacher was upset with my for wearing a sweater in class, I was wearing a hoodie when it was 86 degrees outside, I felt like there was no hope for me. Yes, I Jazzy was depressed and suicidal in 6th grade. I had put so much pressure on myself by then that I felt like that was the only way I could ever be happy again. I still put a lot of pressure on myself and I'm still trying to get better, but my point in writing this is to tell all of you older kids who say 12 year olds are just whiny and hypocritical realize that it is a serious problem, and we feel the same way that you do.
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